Die Koelner Bierhalle

No Longer In Business

Stopped in for bite to eat prior to new brewery sneak peak. Big beer hall that was pretty empty. Got new Zwickl rate so that’s great. Bartender very friendly gave me free glass of mulled wine. Wish for bigger selection and less of standard craft things you can find anywhere but a fun nice place.

The first stop on a bar crawl through Brooklyn with some local homebrew guys. Fairly new place, I think they said it’s been open maybe 6 months. Big and open with some very large tables. Tap list here is all German and while it leans heavily toward the lighter stuff, there were a couple of interesting things on, and I opted for a Schlenkerla Helles to go with my monstrous pretzel. Seriously, the thing was a meal by itself for $6. Prices for beer weren’t terrible, but nothing outstanding either. There was a kids birthday party going on while we were here, but that may speak more to the young Brooklyn crowd than anything else. Service was good, food and beer were good. Worth a stop if you’re nearby. Fun place.

STOP! DO NOT GO HERE! CLICK AWAY! RUN! Or read on to satisfy your morbid curiosity. My wife and I and two other couples went here last night, a Friday, at 7:30-ish. We were casually celebrating our anniversary and we wanted to sit and eat, or else we would normally go to one of the great beer bars in this area (Mission Dolores, 4th Ave Pub, the Gate). When we arrived, the place looked pretty cool, almost like a real German beer hall. The hostess (manager?!?!) seated us and asked if we had any questions.. As we were quite thirsty and wanting to celebrate, and I couldn’t see any wait staff, I asked her if she could take our beer order, so we could get started. She said, no, and she would send the waitress over. Fifteen minutes later, I catch her attention while she is standing there doing nothing, and I say, "Can we order some beer?" Finally, the waitress comes over. We order three beers. She stands there entering them into some kind of handheld gadget for about two minutes. F’chrissakes it’s three beers. Write ’em on scratch pad! Fifteen minutes later, we still don’t have the beers. I turn to get the hostess’s attention, and she and the other waitress are standing there chatting. The other waitress comes over, "Is there a problem, sir?" "Yes, there’s a problem. We’ve been here more than half an hour and we can’t get a frigging beer and you and the other lady are standing there doing absolutely nothing! Can someone please get us some beer?" She said she’d check on it, no apologies, and returned with our beers that had been sitting on the bar for god-knows how long. It got worse from there. Our food order got all screwed up. My friend’s wife ordered a portobello sandwich. It was about half a mushroom cut into three slices on a kaiser roll, $9, and it took over an hour to get to us; we had all finished our dinners by then. To top it off, when the check came, which somehow totaled over $200, while we were discussing how little to tip, my wife noticed that they had already tacked on 20% for their fine service. Anyhow, please do yourself and me a favor and avoid this place like the plague.

Nice big bar/beer garden with a long list of German beers and food. Was pretty crowded and lively when I went on a Saturday night. A lot fo beers but many of them were pretty mediocore. I’m not that into German beer but for someone who is, this would be a great place