Schaefer Light

Pabst Brewing Company
Brewed at Miller Brewing Company (MillerCoors)
Style: Pale Lager
Woodridge, Illinois USA

Serve in Dimpled mug, Lager glass, Shaker

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Tailgating 2004: Swill Beer #4. Tailgating season is once again upon us. We’re not allowed to bring bottles of beer to the tailgating festivities, so instead of killing ourselves trying to find good beer in cans, we make delicious homebrew to bring in a Party Pig, and accompany it with the worst canned beers available. This year’s fourth choice: Schaefer Light.

Golden in color, clear, with a large fizzy head that totally diminishes. Very light aroma with only the slightest whiffs of grain. Lightly sweet flavor. My God, the aftertaste is sour like milk, chalky, dry, and nearly vomit inducing. Moderately carbonated, yet thin mouthfeel. Swill beer, I salute you!

Man! Can you even call this beer?! The fact that the box says "Schaefer Light Lager Beer" makes me chuckle even now. Lager beer? Do you really have to spell that one out for us? Actually, you really do with Schaefer Light. It smells almost like urine. But that’s OK, because that’s the only information your senses are gonna get from this one. No taste, you can hardly even feel the carbonation in your mouth. I just feel dumb drinking from this can. That’s all I feel. So yeah, I give it a 2 in overall expression, because I know I’d rather drink this than Coors Non-Alcoholic. But I’d rather drink anything else besides those two.

Geezus Khrist! This is one of the most watered down light beers I’ve ever had. No flavor what so ever. I was sitting in a hotel room in Baltimore waiting for the storm to let up so I could fly home, guzzling can after can of this stuff. I would have gotten a better buzz holding my breath and spinning around the floor. Is there any alcohol in this? It’s just canned bubbly water if you ask me.

Diluted Schaefer. Pours pale yellow, smells putrid, and tastes horrible. Stay away.

This light isn't the worst on the market. It is a cheap beer, very watery. Definetley a lady's beer.

I hate to admit it, but this watered down number leaves a better impression on me that bud light. At least this one doesn't claim to be good.

In general most light beers you pick up at the grocery store aren't all that good. This is no exception. Watered down, so vile that you won't even find it at a frat party.

Pale yellow with minimal head, and a mild beery aroma. Rather thin, but there is a roasted or perhaps scorched note to it that enhances the flavor somewhat. Hint of saltiness and an elusive dry finish. A sensible and frugal choice for the fans of light brews.

I can't bring myself to talk about this horrible stuff. It's cheap. Engineering students seem to have an uncanny ability to drink it. Great for crepitation competitions.

Very watery, less carb than most american lagers. Vitually no flavor, but at the same time, nothing overly unpleasant. Better than Natural Light.