15 Steps to Becoming a Douchebag at the GABF

Reads 2195 • Replies 22 • Started Friday, October 05, 2012 1:43:40 PM CT

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joet
admin
beers 2509 º places 103 º 13:43 Fri 10/5/2012

Not that funny. Actually kind of scary but... here ya go.

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http://www.fermentedlychallenged.com/2012/10/15-steps-to-becoming-douchebag-at-gabf.html

Step One - Get really wasted before you get to the convention center. Youíre going to be drinking all night, better warm up for it. Just be cool when going through security and theyíll never know youíre liquored up.

Step Two - Donít bother eating anything before you go. Liquid nourishment is all you need and your stomach is going to be full of liquid anyway. Youíll need as much stomach space for beer as possible. You can always bum a pretzel off the nerds with the necklaces later.

More at the link....


 
Walt
beers 2449 º places 189 º 14:30 Fri 10/5/2012

Crap. I already do numbers 1 and 2 and I havenít even clicked the link!

 
TheWhiteWolf
beers 3 º 14:42 Fri 10/5/2012

Step Eleven - When they announce Last Call, use that as a signal to drink as much beer as you can in the last few
remaining visits. Hit those tables with no lines and slam down as many as you can before they kick you out the door.

Yup

 
Cletus
beers 6355 º places 233 º 14:49 Fri 10/5/2012

The sad part is there are plenty of those at every beer festival. Not just GABF. I ran into someone (literally) who was so drunk he couldnít even formulate a sentence at NOTB. This was on the way in. What is the point of going to a beer festival if youíre going to get hammered before you even walk in the door?

 
TheWhiteWolf
beers 3 º 14:52 Fri 10/5/2012

A lot of older folks I saw at Philly beer week this year were hung over and in no condition to drink but they were lined up for the early events. This one guy puked in Pinocchios during the FW event.

 
Reid
beers 2254 º places 47 º 14:56 Fri 10/5/2012

I sometimes fall in to #1..and not at beer festivals..before going out to a nice beer place.
I drink one but its so tasty i drink another.... then eventually its 4 and im buzzed and headed out the door

 
beerinmeear
places 1 º 15:09 Fri 10/5/2012

step 16: state the obvious after a perfectly good joke: "Obviously, you should strive to be just the opposite. This list was only meant as an example of what NOT to do at the GABF."

 
kryptic
15:12 Fri 10/5/2012

Originally posted by beerinmeear
step 16: state the obvious after a perfectly good joke: "Obviously, you should strive to be just the opposite. This list was only meant as an example of what NOT to do at the GABF."




This is America though. If they didnít put some sort of disclaimer on there, someone would inevitably try to blame them for their own stupidity and sue them.

 
fly
beers 1459 º places 247 º 15:15 Fri 10/5/2012

Nothing quite like having to do a quick side step to avoid the pool of vomit as you navigate the throngs....

 
KAggie97
beers 3529 º places 220 º 15:21 Fri 10/5/2012

Originally posted by fly
Nothing quite like having to do a quick side step to avoid the pool of vomit as you navigate the thongs....




Same thing for me.

 
Drake
beers 11500 º places 669 º 22:32 Fri 10/5/2012

Glad Iím only 1/15th asshole. #11 for me as well.