Give me death or give me life
Give me day or give me night
Give me love or give me strife
But goddammit please, just don’t give me a Bud Light.
Ok, go ahead and give me the Bud Light if that’s all you have.

28 years in the beer biz. Objective but never subjective.

Milestones

1: Deschutes Inversion IPA
100: Sierra Nevada Bigfoot
200: Deschutes Hop Trip (personal keg)
300: Sierra Nevada 30th Anniversary Fritz & Kens Ale
400: Stone Imperial Russian Stout
500: Westvleteren 12
600: Mikkeller Beer Geek Brunch Weasel
700: Port Brewing Older Viscosity
800: BFM Abbaye de Saint Bon-Chien 2007
900: Firestone Walker XV
1000: AleSmith Speedway Stout
1100: BFM Abbaye de Saint Bon-Chien Grand Cru 2010 (Rhum Barrels)
1200: Firestone Walker 16
1300: Boulevard Love Child No. 3
1400: AleSmith Barrel Aged Decadence 2011
1500: Cantillon Saint Lamvinus
1600: Logsdon Peche ’n Brett
1700: Evil Twin Imperial Doughnut Break
1800: Bush Prestige (Scaldis Prestige) 2013 Vintage
1900: Green Flash Silva Stout
2000: Fremont Kentucky Dark Star
2100: Firestone Walker 19
2200: New Glarus Wisconsin Belgian Red

Anniversary milestones:

Year 1: Delirium Tremens and Delirium Nocturnum
Year 2: Avery Anniversary Eighteen, Firestone Walker 14, and my 700th rating, Port Brewing Older Viscosity
Year 3: Avery Anniversary Nineteen
Year 4: Bruery Bois
Year 5: Oops, forgot this year
Year 6: Does anyone give a fuck? Come on now.

No other beverage pleases my soul more than beer. I’m a strong believer in quality, hand crafted beer and think beer that is mass-produced is as boring as watching a paint drying/grass growing competition on C-SPAN, with your host Al Gore.

Synonyms for a completely black beer, compiled from my ratings, purely for comedy: black as can be, inky black, black as Ivan the Terrible’s asshole, impervious cauldron black, opaque black, blacker than a gargoyle’s asshole, like midnight, coal black, darker than a demon’s arsehole, black as Rasputin’s asshole, tar black, black as a goose’s asshole, pitch black, blacker than black, impervious black, deep black, black as black, completely black, darker than a dragon’s asshole, impenetrable black, completely impervious motor oil-black, abyss black, black, black, black [ less ]

Give me death or give me life
Give me day or give me night
Give me love or give me strife
But goddammit please, just don’t give me a Bud Light.
Ok, go ahead and give me the Bud Light if that’s all you have.

28 years in the beer biz. Objective but never subjective.

Milestones

1: Deschutes Inversion IPA
100: Sierra Nevada Bigfoot
200: Deschutes Hop Trip (personal keg)
300: Sierra Nevada 30th Anniversary Fritz & Kens Ale [ more ]